Time to start over...

Hey hey everyone!! No, I didn't die of food poisoning from some bad holiday fruitcake! (But seriously, though, is there such a thing as GOOD holiday fruitcake?!)

I want to let you all in on an amazing little book my best friend bought for me! And for everyone who's going through the same crappy heartbreak as me, check out It's Called a Break-up Because It's Broken by Greg Behrendt and Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt. It's a hilarious approach to a "yeah, it's so hilarious I want to DIE" kind of situation like a break-up.

But while reading through it, I came across a page that reminded me of a fad a few years ago. Do you remember those AWFUL websites where you could anonymously post horrible things about an ex, a Do-Not-Date kind of list, and warn anyone who read the post not to date your ex? Well, to be honest, after Ben and I split, I was tempted. And now that enough time has passed, I'm really starting to see passed all the things I thought were so amazing, and really noticed for the first time that, well, he WASN'T prince charming, or else he wouldn't have dumped me... So, instead of confirming to him that I am, indeed, a psycho, I vote that I write my "DO NOT DATE BEN BECAUSE OF...." list here. And I'd be absolutely delighted if you would join in and write an ex-bashing post with me.

Dear women of the world,
I'm writing this to warn you that you never, ever, EVER want to waste your time dating Ben W****. He will treat you horribly. He will make you feel so insufficient and inadequate. He'll lift your hopes up so high, only to crash them down again. He will stand you up on every occasion he gets. HE'LL TELL ALL YOUR SECRETS, and he'll never really listen to you unless you're telling him about how hot your 17-year-old cousin looks in her bikini... LADIES: DO NOT DATE HIM! Because the worst part about Ben? ...He will make you love him. And the second he's sure you do, he will run for it. No, don't even think about telling him. He's not capable of LOVING anyone other than himself. Stay away. Stay far, far, far away!

Sounds like a really great catch, huh? No, more like he's the nasty fish you reel in that doesn't have any scales and is half-rotted with barbed fish hooks sticking out of it all over, so when you try to hold on to it tight, it just hurts you...

I finally deleted all his old emails and locked text messages... It felt liberating, like he didn't have control over me anymore. And even though I miss him like crazy and I'd do anything in the world just to have that crappy, horrible, destructive, poisonous relationship back... I know it's for the best.

Sadly, I do not get paid to write my life's story on my blog, so I have to leave for work now. But here's a little activity that always makes me feel better after a break up. Fill in the blanks! =)

(Ex's Name) was a ______ with a ____ _______. He never ____ and all he ever wanted to do was _______.
I never could _____ when I was with him, and I never ______ anything he said. Yes, maybe I loved him, but the relationship was _______. Now that he's gone, I can finally _______. He was bad for me because _________. And I'm better off without him because of ___________.

Feel free to make your own and post it if you'd like.

<3 You guys!
Sarah